Some Things You might Try to Make Your Life Work Better for You
For a couple of weeks make a daily The A-B-C Connection form. Become aware that it is not the event or person that upsets you, but what you think about that event or person. Take some time and reflect well on the events or people in your life that you get upset about; really convince yourself that your thinking is the connection to your disturbance.
Read or listen to tapes on REBT. Let yourself absorb correct ideas and philosophies. These will greatly help you to get your thinking straight. You can get them at the Albert Ellis Institute.
Dispute in writing, in your thoughts, and even out loud if you are inclined, all that nonsense you have believed. Dispute until you really do not believe that junk. Dispute until you find you are no longer acting on those old crazy beliefs. Try Disputing.
Everyday for a few weeks do some shame attacking exercise, found at Shame and guilt.
Take some risks to achieve what's in your interest. So what if you don't get it, get rejected, or suffer some inconvenience. If it is in your interest, it may also be worth some loss to attempt to get it.
Attend a REBT self-help type support group meeting. You might find you have something to offer as well as to gain.
Make a list of your most reliable excuses for avoiding things that are in your interest to do. Everyday for a couple of weeks write these excuses down, over and over; read them out loud. Recognize them for the irrational beliefs they are. Dispute them.
As the Nike commercial said, "Just do it." Go out there and do that thing you have been avoiding.
Everyday for a couple of weeks schedule just 5 minutes to do something useful in your life that you would not otherwise have done that day.
Everyday for a couple of weeks do some Rational Emotive Imagery. Imagine some unpleasant thing or person; really get those crazy emotions or physiologic upsets going. Notice your thinking. Now change those unpleasant emotions and painful physiologic upsets to feelings you prefer to have. Notice your thinking. Become used to the skill of changing crazy reactions to appropriate responses.
Read How to Stubbornly Refuse To Make Yourself Miserable About Anything—Yes, Anything! REVISED 2nd Edition. By Albert Ellis, Ph. D
If you haven't done it yet, now is a great time to check out the Albert Ellis Institute and the Albert Ellis Institute Bookstore.
